Happiness is overrated.

I haven't written in quite some time, partly because life has been busy, but mostly because I haven't felt inspired by anything lately. Nothing too terrible or too wonderful has happened to thrust me into a blogging flurry. In fact, my life has felt consistently in a rut lately. Wanting to avoid writing a bitter diatribe, I just haven't written at all. Today however, in an attempt to procrastinate from studying, I came across an article on the Nobel Prize winning journalistic marvel that is People.com that got me thinking. I know, the articles that get me thinking should probably be from the New York Times or CNN, but let's face it, mindless time-wasting celebrity fodder is just easier to stomach these days than following sex abuse scandals and watching our economy fall apart. The article was written about an interview that Brad Pitt had with Australian TV. Normally I'm not too interested in what's going on with the Jolie-Pitt's and their multi-cultural child army, but like I said, I'm procrastinating. When asked if he was happy in life his response really hit home for me.
"I think happiness is overrated, truthfully. I do," he says. "I think sometimes you're happy, sometimes you're not. There's too much pressure to be happy. I don't know. I don't really give a shit. I know I will be at times and I know I won't be at times. Satisfied, at peace, those would be goals for myself."
Holy crap! Anyone else feel a huge sigh of relief over those words? I know I did. Lately, I haven't been happy. Maybe it's hormones, not enough vitamin D, the fact that my IC symptoms are really obnoxious, or just the fact that I don't like school and I don't like my job. I have spent more than a few nights lying awake trying to put my thumb on my general apathy for life lately. J and I are experiencing a rut. Is it that? Am I unhappy in my relationship? When I think about a life without him in it I get truly sad, so whatever is making me unhappy has to do with nobody else but me. There are a lot of things contributing to it and sometimes when I'm in a valley it feels like I need drastic changes to get me on top of a hill instead. Then that snowballs into over-dramatism about the state of my life, which just isn't a good color on me.
I had never considered that the idea of constant happiness IS overrated. Just because I'm not happy now doesn't mean that I don't have an amazing life full of blessings and a lot of happiness ahead of me. Now that I think about it, who wants to be happy all the time? It would be like living life as a chocolate lab puppy....annoying as shit. As cliche as it sounds, maybe the valleys are necessary to make us fight for the hills, and appreciate the view when we're up there. I just need to stop over-analyzing my life and stop trying to force happiness into every nook and cranny. Hell, I will probably be happy the second I stop trying to be so damn happy.
Philosopher Pitt has it right. The goals of being satisfied and at peace with yourself (and I'm going to add in being aware of your blessings) are enough for the times when perhaps unconfined joy isn't necessarily overwhelming your soul. I'm really grateful that my penchant for vapid celebrity news paid off today because I'm pretty sure that the top of the next hill is right around the corner and I don't want to miss the view by always trying to go higher. I'm fine just getting through this rut, appreciating it for what it is, and looking forward to what's next.